I had been sitting on the couch in my usual daily position, perched, watching tv, and checking the comings and goings outside my window, the busy Bayview Street, neighbours and people walking past. This is where I do most of my thinking. As Jacleen posted on facebook yesterday (very profoundly)…. “ it all starts with a thought”. My mind must be in meditation mode much of the time because magically a thought just drifted in to my mind. It said “ the power of the mustard seed”.
I knew that story was in the Bible so I headed to good old Google and checked it out. I discovered it was Matthew 13: 31-32, Matthew 17: 20 and Luke 17: 6. Following are a few versions I found on the net:
New International Version (©1984)
He replied, "Because you have so little faith. I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you."
New Living Translation (©2007)
"You don't have enough faith," Jesus told them. "I tell you the truth, if you had faith even as small as a mustard seed, you could say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there,' and it would move. Nothing would be impossible."
English Standard Version (©2001)
He said to them, “Because of your little faith. For truly, I say to you, if you have faith like a grain of mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move, and nothing will be impossible for you.”
I had been judging myself harshly having read about the shadow grace in Caroline Myss’ book “Defy Gravity”, believing myself to be a sloth (although my shrink tells me sloths eventually do get things done). I’ve now decided that I may have been meant to be a sloth, that the power of my mind AND my FAITH is huge. I don’t operate effectively when I move forcefully or erratically or hastily in life. This is what contributes to mania and a desire to allow my EGO to rule me (without connection to the Divine). When this occurs, everything comes undone.
A couple of years ago, a series of synchronicities led me to the conclusion that anything is possible. Through the story of the mustard seed, I get that same message……. “nothing is impossible” I do believe this. I’m starting to just accept the blessings (Grace) as they come, with gratitude. I know I was just watching tv. I wasn’t thinking about Bible stories or parables or mustard seeds. It just came………… “no doubt the Universe is unfolding as it should…” and (as my Dad would say… “don’t rush the tote!!”)
I surrendered. I pray. I try hard to remember to be grateful. I’m trying to believe in myself and go with the flow, live in the Tao. I’m in this place because I learned not to swim against the tide to get what I want. Stress is ego-based. I let go and let God. I remember when I was coming to terms with putting all my John Denver stuff away, not touching it and trusting in God (“Jenny Dreamed of Trains”. I didn’t really want to do it, but the story of Abraham sacrificing his son to God came to mind and another story along similar lines popped up at that time in “Freedom Is” by Brandon Bays. My computer had slowed down almost to stopping (as I had used it manically for a month and was way over my download and upload) and I just wanted to play “Gospel Changes” John Denver one more time on YouTube. The screen froze on a picture of a hymn book and just one line was written across the page …. “God’s in charge”.. Wow!!!!!!!
PS A couple of years ago, my son recorded a song with a little boy called Connor. It was called “How Good it would Be!” by Patrick Gambles………. and a line in it goes like this… “if faith could truly move that mountain, how good it would be”.
23/1/15 A little clip from Oprah that I totally agree with
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